The interpolation and achievements of the hanafee scholars in making the lawful, and permissible things more easy for us.
Hanafee Deobandee Restaurant
The Famous Indhiraa Ghandee Hotel
Compiled and Presented by
The Hanafee Scholars of Deoband The Movement For the Revival and Establishment of Hanafee Fiqh
Abu Hibbaan and Abu Khuzaimah Ansaari
This is a small treatise that outlines the bizarre and weird hanafee fiqh. It shows some of the things the hanafee madhab allows and holds to be permissible in the religion without any evidences from the Qur’aan and Sunnah.
The treatise is in the form of a conversation between a hanafee restaurantee and a customer.
Hanafee Waiter: Welcome sir, we have opened this hotel in the name of the beloved and favoured aunty of the deobandi’s, Mrs Indhiraa Ghandee, and it is for the service to the public.
Customer: Oh brother, why is this the case, deobandee’s are Muslim’s and Indhiraa Ghandee is against Islaam. (as she was a hindu)
Hanafee Waiter: We deobandee’s have a special relation of love with Indhiraa Ghandee, because on our 100th (hundred) anniversary of deoband, she was invited with great esteem and reverence, and poem’s were recited for and about her.
Customer: Can I have any cooked meat?
Waiter: Oh yes we have the meat of dogs, cats, elephants, tigers, cheetahs, donkeys, horses and even pig meat. Yes we also have mincemeat, meatballs, ribs and roast available at all times because bismillah is recited when they are slaughtered. As this is mentioned in our reliable book of fiqh, that every animal that is lawful when tanned and when that animal is slaughtered after the excrement is removed from it, it becomes halaal (lawful). [Hidaayah With Fath ul-Qadeer (1/83-84)]
Customer: What else do you have cooked?
Waiter: We have the roasted meat of such a goat that has the face of a dog and the rest of its body is like a goat. Which came about by the cross breeding of a dog and a goat. And it also eats grass and meat, it also barks like a dog and makes sounds like a goat. When it was slaughtered it had intestines in it and according to our madhab a goat with these characteristics is lawful however its head is unlawful. That is why we have roasted it with an exquisite taste, especially for our hanafee brothers. Do not get upset or worried this is clearly and explicitly mentioned in our hanafee books. [Fatawaa Qadhee Khaan (3/357), Fataawa Aalamgheeree (5/290) ]
Customer: forget it brother you cook such (nasty) things.
Waiter: Do not get upset with us, we have a ram, which has been raised by drinking the milk of a donkey and pig, and it also ate grass for a couple of days. It is mentioned in our hanafee book there is no harm in this [Fatawaa Aalamgheeri (5/290)]. That’s why we have cooked some nice kebabs with it.
Customer: okay brother enough of this, tell me some nice food.
Waiter: Oh yes we have a calf of a cow that was in its mother womb. The slaughterer put his hand into the private part of the cow with the knife and slaughtered it. As this is lawful [Fatawaa Aalamgheeri (5/284)], very delicious balti meat has been cooked with it.
Customer: Look!!!! do you have any lawful food that you can give me?
Waiter: Oh yes we have the darkest and most mischievous bird known as the crow, we have it specially cooked however some people think it is forbidden to eat, but you will find in many books of fiqh aswell as other books that the crow is lawful. Even a few years ago our hanafee scholars prepared a feast made from crow’s and they distributed it amongst the people! [Tadhkirratur-Rasheed Ahmad Gangohee Deobandee Hanafee (2/177)].
Customer: Do you have meat of any other bird that I may have.
Waiter: Yes we have a beautifully cooked bat. One of our classical hanafee fiqh
book states the bat should be eaten [Fatawaa Alaamgheeree (5/290)]. We even eat the meat of an owl, believe me it’s very tasty, this is also written in our classical hanafee fiqh book. [Fatawaa Alaamgheeree (5/290)]
Customer: May Allaah leave such meat for you to eat. Do you have any fish.
Waiter: Animals that go in water, eg the turtle, frog, crocodile, crab are all easily available as we can order them from our brothers hotel who is a Shaafi’ee muqallid. As you know he is a muqallid also and so am I. We have come up with a plan to prepare a social seafood dish. So a fish is placed in some unclean water and then it is allowed to mature and grow in it. Then our hanafee scholars have said in their famous book, there is no harm in eating this fish. [al-Ishbah wan-Nadhaa’ir (p.159)] This is why we prepare this special seafood dish only for our hanafee brothers and we endeavour to get these special dishes with their various varieties to the hanafee public, of course if we were to leave these tried and tested recipes we would become non- muqallids.
Customer: You are very rude, you do not even give me a seat to I can sit down.
Waiter: There are many seats and tables here, chose anyone you wish.
Customer: Look brother where shall I sit. Every chair has excrement smothered over it.
Waiter: Looks like you have been influenced by the Ahlul-Hadeeth because according to our fiqh excrement is not an impure substance.
Customer: Look brother what are you saying? It looks like this chair has women’s menstruation blood over it.
Waiter: Yes you are right, when a hanafee couple, man and woman sit here,
during their love chat, kissing and extreme emotions the blood that discharges
from the woman private part is clean and pure. [Durr al-Mukhtaar Haashiyyah Shaamee (1/123)]
Customer: Oh never mind the woman’s menstruating blood, you’ve even got drops of sperm on the table there, what shall be done about that.
Waiter: Do not worry about it have patience and remain seated. If such quantities of impurity are on ones limbs or clothes then by licking it three times it becomes pure. [Fatawaa Aalamgheeri (1/45), Durr al-Mukhtaar (1/226) ]
Customer: I’m amazed as to how this menstruation blood and sperm got here in the first place. Oh oh look at that man over there he’s masturbating in this crowded hotel, throw him out of the hotel.
Waiter: Why are you amazed? In our reliable and trustworthy hanafee fiqh book it says, when pleasure overpowers a person and he has no wife or servant, then he may masturbate for relief and it is hoped there is no sin upon him. And if there is the possibility of Sinning (ie committing fornication for relief) then it is obligatory for him to masturbate. [Durr al-Mukhtaar Haashiyyah Shaamee (3/171) ]
Why shall we then prohibit something that is obligatory and how shall we expel people who are committing these obligatory acts. Rather Imaam Shaamee said “If there is fear of fornication, then he will get reward for it (masturbating).[Minhatal Khaaliq (p.61)] The impurities on the chairs and tables have been discharged due to these actions which become pure by licking them three times.
Customer: Oh brother, what is that!!!! A man is engaging in anal intercourse with a woman behind the curtains and over there a man is having sexual intercourse with another man!!! What is this game.
Waiter: Oh brother this really is the family section. They both are husband and wife and them performing this anal intercourse is not something strange because this is called “exception for the scholars” as our big scholars and holy people also used to indulge in this. It is mentioned in our trustworthy and reliable deobandi book of fiqh, “Whether a man with his wife or a man with another man indulges in the act of the people of Loot (homosexuality) then there is no prescribed punishment upon them.”[ Qadooree (p.216)]
Customer: Oh brother when did this become an exception for the scholars, it is an unnatural, despicable and an unliked act.
Waiter: If this was a bad act then there would not have been an exception for our scholars rather this is their liked and favoured action, and this will also be in paradise.[ al-Ishbah wan-Nadhaair (p.189)]
Another customer enters the inner part of the restaurant
Waiter: Oh brother, where are you going our store room is there.
Customer: Oh yes is that your store room. Uff you have got dead bodies, pigs and donkey carcasses. What is this?
Waiter: You are a strange person. It is written in our books that if their carcasses become salt, then the salt is pure and lawful. To the extent it has been said about the donkey, “The donkey all of it including its fifth leg is pure and lawful.”[ Fataawa Aalamgheeree (1/43)] That’s why whilst cooking a pig or a curry the salt that is used and which is placed on the tables and in the containers, all belongs to the donkey.
Customer: Brother could you give me some water at least. Since you do not having anything appropriate to eat.
Waiter: Okay brother wait a minute. I’ll just give you water from the hose downstairs.
Customer: He looks at the water container and the hose downstairs and he sees there is a dead dog to one side. So he asks the waiter what is happening?
Waiter: Looks like as if you do not have any knowledge concerning fiqh issues. This hose we have made exactly according to our deobandi teachings and we have made it to our special size of (10 x 10). So when impurities accumulate at one side like a dead dog, then the water on the other side does not become impure, so that it remains clean and pure. I mean there is no need for a major book just look at the quote from Behshitee Zewar.
Issue number 11. A large hose which is 10 handspan long and 10 handspan wide and so deep that when water is raised from it, the land does not open. If impurities fall into it that are not visible like urine for instance, blood, alcohol and others then it is permissible and correct to perform wudu from all four sides our wherever one may feel from.[ Behshitee Zewar (p.52) Part 1.]
Customer: What facilities have you provided for someone who wishes to spend the night in the hotel?
Waiter: In light of deobandi fiqh in order to please our customers we consider it our religious obligation to provide pleasurable facilities. If you request a woman for fornication then a woman is also available on loan because in our madhab there is no punishment upon the person who hires a woman and commits fornication with her.[ Fataaawa Qadhee Khaan (3/468) on the footnotes of Aalamgheeree.]
Customer: What are the facilities of serving alcohol here?
Waiter: Sir, we have alcohol here fermented from grapes, dates, wheat, maize, apple and a number of other things and when drinking the alcohol you become drunk by intoxication then according to us, “It is permissible to drink the alcohol.”[ Fataawa Aalamgheeree (5/414)] Also if by drinking 9 glasses of the alcohol fermented from dates you do not become drunk and then upon drinking the 10th glass you become drunk, we can serve and you can drink the 9 glasses.[ Fataawa Aalamgheeree (5/413)]
We also serve the Abu Yoosufee alcohol brand, which our famous Imaam Qadhee Abu Yoosuf formulated for the Khaleeph of the time, Haroom Rasheed for his pleasure and satisfaction.
Customer: I mean you do not really have anything to drink or to eat which is lawful, I have some apple’s so I will have them to eat, could you pass me a knife please.
Waiter: He brings the knife and places it on the table on a pile of impurity.
Customer: Oh you fool what have you done, why have you put the knife on the table covered with impurities, it has become impure now.
Waiter: Look, I have already mentioned to you from your own books that licking the instrument three times purifies it from the impurities and Najasah (urinal excrements). Concerning the knife, Fataawa Aalamgheeree mentions, “When a knife becomes impure like this then it is purified by licking it with the tongue or with the saliva.”[ Fataawa Aalamgheeree (1/45)] So please lick the knife first and then cut your apples.
Customer: What is animal skin that placed over there?
Waiter: That is a prayer mat which is made of dog skin and it has been tanned and Durr al-Mukhtaar mentions, “Dog skin can be used for a prayer mat or as a vessel for carrying water.”[ Durr al-Mukhtaar (1/153)] So we present this prayer mat for our deobandi customers when they pray. For our deobandi customers we present them with this prayer mat when the time for prayer comes.
Customer: What is that vessel and what is inside it?
Waiter: I have just told you a water vessel according to us can be made from dog skin so why should not that vessel be made from dog skin. It contains water from the fountain downstairs, which has a dead decaying dog lying at one side. There is water on the other side so that our deobandi brothers can perform wudhu for the prayer.
Customer: Why is a naked woman sitting directly in front of the prayer mat in a very direct and upfront manner and why is that Qur’aan specifically locked in that cabinet over there?
Waiter: Whilst praying on this prayer mat if a deobandi wishes the desire to look at a woman’s private part for sexual satisfaction, then his prayer will not be invalid.[ al-Ishbah wan-Nadhaair (p.418)] This is why we have provided this facility so that our deobandi worshippers can benefit from this pleasurable facility and service available to them from the deobandi fiqh. As looking at a woman’s private parts with pleasure whilst in the state of prayer does not render his prayer to be invalid. However if a person whilst in a state of prayer looks at the Qur’aan or recites it during his prayer then his prayer becomes invalid, this is why we have specifically locked the Qur’aan away in that cabinet over there.[ al-Ishbah wan-Nadhaair (p.418)]
Customer: Okay so tell me why is that dog puppy sitting next to him (the deobandi who is praying)
Waiter: If a person who is praying wishes to hold a puppy or a large dog whose mouth is shut in his armpits then he may do so and his prayer does not become invalid[Durr al-Mukhtaar (1/153)] this is why we have provided this facility
Customer: I have never seen or heard of a restaurant like this one.
Waiter: Yes really you will not be able to find such a hotel in the whole world. We are just serving the people according to our deobandi fiqh of our brothers. However some time ago we published a poster to disgrace and discredit the Ahlul-Hadeeth and we called it, “Subhah Kee Nihaaree Naa Dukh Naa Bimaaree.”[ (Trans note), “The Morning Nihaaree, No Sorrow and No Illness.” (Nihaaree is a mixed dish from the sub-Continent)] It was about an Ahlul-Hadeeth hotel and all the references we gave in it were from the books of Moulwee Waheed uz-Zamaan and his fiqh conformed to our deobandi fiqh because Moulwee Waheed uz-Zamaan was a deobandi in reality as in mentioned in Hayaat Waheed uz-Zamaan,
“As the family of Moulwee Waheed uz-Zamaan was a deobandi during the early part of his life. During the early years of his life he had a great inclination towards the deobandi madhab. This is the reason why the first book he translated was the famous deobandi book of fiqh, Sharh Waqaayah. He also wrote a concise explanation of it in urdu in which he (supposedly) thoroughly answered the evidences of the non-muqallids and established the deobandi madhab with clear and definite evidences. He was a muqallid and a very staunch one, however his research and investigation increased day by day and his reliance on taqleed decreased."
The author of Hayaat Waheed uz-Zamaan writes,
“The Maulana had aspects changing his mind quickly due to which he differed with the majority of the people of hadeeth. The reason why these differences arose was when he authored ‘Hidaayatul Muhdee’ and then the Ahlul-Hadeeth started opposing him.”[ Hayaat Waheed uz-Zamaan (p.101)]
To the extent that the Maulana wrote a letter to one of his friends and said,
“One of my friends wrote a letter to me saying that since I wrote the book Hidaayatul Muhdee a great majority of the Ahlul-Hadeeth like Moulwee Shams ul-Haqq A’dheemabaadee, Moulwee Muhamamd Hussain Lahoree, Moulwee Abdullaah Ghaazeepooree, Moulwee Faqeerullaah Punjaabee and Maulana Thanaullaah Amristsaree became disheartened with me and the normal Ahlul-Hadeeth people lost respect and belief in me.”[ Hayaat Waheed uz-Zamaan (p.101)]
So due to a period of time the label of Ahlul-Hadeeth would be attached to his name. We in order to dishonour them would present and quote his statements, whereas Moulwee Waheed uz-Zamaan would get paid by Nawaab Siddeeque Hasan Khaan to translate books of hadeeth. He according to the madhab of his forefathers ie Hanafiyyah would drag his matureedee and raafidhee beliefs into the translations and these people (ie deobandi’s) considered him to be Ahlul-Hadeeth.
Another point is that one of our debaters for the deobandi’s of Paakistaan, Moulwee Ameen Okarwee wrote and printed a small treatise which he titled, “200 issues of fiqh of the non-muqallids.” In order to dishonour and discredit the Ahlul-Hadeeth. In it he also quoted issues from this Waheed uz-Zamaan which were also in reality from our books of deobandi fiqh. This further supports that Waheed uz-Zamaan was dragging such misguidance from the deobandi fiqh into the Ahlul-Hadeeth and it is also not hidden that diseases and germs of raafdhiyyat and shee’ism were also found in him.”
So we just for the sake of dishonouring and disgracing them quoted this whereas in reality the madhab of the Ahlul-Hadeeth is the purely the Qur’aan and Sunnah as they do not accept the personal opinions or statements of anyone nor to they indulge in promoting one particular individual.
Customer: After listening to you my head is spinning and hurting and I am feeling very uneasy.
All of a sudden the customer starts to bleed from his nose and the waiter starts to collect his blood. So the customers asks, “Brother, what are you doing?”
Waiter: I am collecting this blood so that I may offer you the best possible remedy for this problem. If someone’s nose bleeds then it is permissible for him to write Soorah Faatihah on his forehead or nose with blood as a cure and if it (ie Soorah Faatihah) is written with urine then this is also permissible.[ Durr al-Mukhtaar (1/154)]
Customer: The disbelievers consider the dog, cat, pig and dead things all to be lawful and so does you deobandi fiqh, then what is the difference between you and them as there seems to be none. So you allow the eating of impurities and dead things, you allow the drinking of dirty water, you hold one gets reward If he does bad things, you consider masturbation is rewarding, you hold homosexuality and anal intercourse to be permissible. Then on the other hand you say deobandi fiqh is a summary of the Qur’aan and hadeeth whereas the Qur’aan says such things are unlawful and you say and make these things to be lawful, this will render you to be disbelievers and polytheists.
Waiter: How will we be polytheists by eating things, which are unlawful? (due to believing they are Lawful)
Customer: The Qur’aan states the people who follow things that oppose the islamic rulings and which are unlawful, they quarrel and fight with the people over these issues, they are polytheists, Allaah the most high said,
“… and shayaateen (devils) do inspire their friends to dispute with you, and if you obey them, then you would indeed be polytheists.”[ Soorah al-An’aam (6):121)]
Waiter: I have to say with such pit,y some of our scholar of this time are leaving Imaam Abu Haneefah’s rulings on fiqh in some issues for example
(1) According to deobandi fiqh the imaamate of a blind person is unlawful (Qadooree), however many blind men are leading the people in the prayers, this is clearly opposing the deobandi fiqh. This is being non-Muqallids.
(2) Jumu’ah is obligatory in major cities which have a leader, where islamic punishments are established and many facilities are available, then Jumu’ah is not permissible in small villages, districts and in small towns. (see the books of deobandi fiqh), However our scholars are opposing this issue of ours.
Customer: People who act upon the Tauraat but do not act upon every ruling or command in it, the Qur’aan says about them,
“The likeness of those who were entrusted with the Tauraat, but subsequently failed in those (obligations), is of the likeness of a donkey who carries a huge burden..”[ Soorah al-Jumu’ah (62):5)]
Are not the deobandi’s like this?
Brother I am feeling very uneasy and having hatred and enmity upon hearing about such types of food. I wonder how you eat them. I congratulate you with such food, hotels and madhab. Allaah has saved me from misguidance, I will abandon taqleed and research from now on and will make my criteria the Qur’aan and hadeeth, Inshallaah.
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